Mindfulness

I'm exploring mindfulness and meditation. I want to start a meditation practice again. (I had one years ago.) I also found a group that promised to help people build a daily practice, and I thought, "That's what I need," but it cost 100 euros, and whoa. All I really need for a meditation practice is a spot to meditate. The group promised to send e-mail reminders, but when I figure out the best time to meditate, I'll set a reminder on my phone.

But I did want some guidance on restarting my practice. Sounds True had a set of CDs (or a download) by Jack Kornfield about how to meditate. It wasn't too expensive, so I was considering it. Then I checked Audible, and found that I had six credits (I have no idea how you earn credits), and spent three credits to get three audiobooks on meditation for free. Deal! Score! I have no idea of the differences between Vipassanā meditation (what Jack Kornfield does) and zazen, but I'll do some research to figure it out.

I have two kinds of mindfulness issues. One is concentration. I've heard of "monkey mind," but I have a whole tribe of monkeys living in my head. I am very distractible. I find it frustrating because I use to have incredible focus before I got hit with my mental illness, but I'm stuck with the monkeys now. Meditation should help.

But I also want to "live deliberately," as Thoreau put it. I've been grappling with the Zen precepts again, and thought about exploring vegetarianism because "I like meat" isn't exactly a moral imperative. I'm not certain that I will go veggie, but I want to think about it and learn instead of going along in my rut. It's also hitting me on a gut level that my comfort isn't a moral imperative either. I'd like to try meditation with a group, and there is one in Bloomington during Sunday evenings, which would be perfect except that I work on Sundays. But there also is one in Springfield at 9 AM on Saturdays, and if I was truly committed, I would find a way to get my lazy butt to Springfield then. Food for thought. Starting a daily practice is a beginning though.

It probably seems like I go off on different new tangents, but actually, my interests haven't changed much throughout my life. Music. Meditation. Languages. Poetry (haven't done much with it lately). Computer programming (I took several classes in it in the past.) Travel.

Zen Master Mimi

I dug out my meditation cushions and brought them upstairs. The zabuton (square padded mat that goes under the meditation cushion) flopped on the floor. Well, Mimi thinks that it's the best cat bed ever. I'm letting her have it for the night (although it's in the most inconvenient spot possible), but I'm reclaiming it tomorrow.

She cracks me up.

"I've known several Zen masters, all of whom were cats." -- Eckhert Tolle (?)

Peace

I meditated for 20 minutes tonight. I caught myself thinking, "20 minutes--that's not bad!" Um, it's not a contest, Adrienne. I didn't notice how much I narrate my life. I caught myself composing a LiveJournal entry about my meditating while I was meditating, and later, a LiveJournal entry about writing a LiveJournal entry in my head while meditating....Ahem. I meditated on the word "peace" for a while to clear out the thoughts. I used the Insight Timer app. I like it because it has groups that you can join to talk about meditation. Anyway, this is a start. And the cats left me alone.

I want to form a daily meditation habit, a daily cleaning and organizing habit, and a daily reading habit, so I posted a calendar in the kitchen, and am using stickers to track my progress. I hope that it helps.

It was a good day. I needed some minor fixes to my car, and I'd have to wait a week to get them done locally, so I went up to Bloomington to have it done. Harlee needed her special food too, so I ran some errands up there.

Mimi, Zara, and I took a nap together when I got home. It's all good.