What matters

[days_unfolding]

Erik lives near Great America, and he has a party every year so that people can view the fireworks on July 4th. Usually I don't go (I feel a little like Exhibit A, the ex-wife), but I decided to go this year. Erik seemed pleased that I showed up; he gave me a little hug or half-hug whenever he'd walk by. (Most of of his friends post-date me, so they probably were wondering who I was. I did get asked once, and kind of stumbled through the answer.) It was a really laid-back time. We watched some anime films, which was interesting to me because I hadn't seen any before, although I kind of OD'd by the third one.

One of Erik's sisters (Linnea) was there, and she also seemed glad to see me. We exchanged details about our lives, which took surprisingly little time -;) I commented about the little kids running around at the party, which were a change from the last time that I had been there. (Apparently Erik's friends have been busy.) She said that yes, she comes to the party every year, and she'd been watching those kids grow up, which sounds lovely. I told her that I haven't been coming to the party because I feel weird, and she said not to worry, that everyone there was a little weird. I said that well, they have Erik in common, so there you go. She said that she was the only one who didn't have Erik in common voluntarily, so she must be the only normal one -;)

We played with sparklers while we were waiting for the fireworks to start. I think that the adults had more fun with the sparklers than the kids -;) The fireworks were lovely.

I didn't get much of a chance to visit with Erik, not surprisingly because he was busy being the host, so we're planning to get together and catch up sometime over the next couple of weeks.

I think that I'm going to start attending the party regularly (at least as long as I'm here). I like the idea of continuity, of marking another year past in the same place. I don't celebrate most holidays because my family is back East, but here's one that I could celebrate.

The rest of the weekend is about chores around the house. The cat tree arrived, and I assembled it. Harlee checked it out thoroughly after I first put it together, seemed to be having fun with it--and hasn't touched it since. I hope that's not a precedent. (Cats!)

I have the strong urge to get rid of most of my stuff, even most of my books. I'm also sorting through my list of things that I would do if I could live my life over, and see what's feasible now. I need to keep my nose to the grindstone sorting through stuff this summer, but maybe in the fall I could add some new things.

Comments

[bandicoot.livejournal.com]

I think things have loosened up a lot with exes. My brother is on his third wife, who is now best-friends with his first ex-wife. They've traveled together to visit his kids and their families, and even drove me down to Minneapolis at the end of my trip.

[days-unfolding.livejournal.com]

Maybe things have loosened up now. When Erik and I first split, some of my friends seemed almost upset that he and I were on such good terms. I guess it messed with their idea of how things should be.

[lesliesailor.livejournal.com]

I think it is really wonderful that you and Erik are on such good terms! It always seems such a shame that when two people who were once close completely lose their friendship when things (romantically) don't work out.

[days-unfolding.livejournal.com]

We've known each other since we were 15 years old (and now we're both 40!). He's definitely a long-term friend -;)